Just kidding!! Seriously though if you haven’t had the pleasure of playing on the NES, do not fret, for the new miniature NES is here to fulfill your gaming needs. 

The original Nintendo Entertainment System was an 8-bit video game console which is obviously owned by the Nintendo franchise. This bulky home video game system was originally released on July 15th, 1983 in Japan as the “Family Computer,” but that name did not stick well with the 1985 American version of the product.

For an 8-bit console, it skyrocketed to new heights, and was labeled as “the best selling console” of its time. The Family Computer, aka the Famicom, came along with the arcade games Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr., and Popeye. The Famicom had a good run, but it’s slow performance and the gaming crashes that came along with it caused the updated version of the console to be released under the name “Nintendo Entertainment System.”

Now an even more updated version of the NES is going to be released on November 11th of this year, but a smaller version of it. The new system will look just like the original, the gray box with the rectangular controller, but it will be able to connect with the Wii and Wii U remotes. Oh also, another cool thing about the new console is that it will have 30 games installed into the system. The games included are:

• Balloon Fight
• Bubble Bobble
• Castlevania
• Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest
• Donkey Kong
• Donkey Kong Jr.
• Double Dragon II: The Revenge
• Dr. Mario
• Excitebike
• Final Fantasy
• Galaga
• Ghosts’N Goblins
• Gradius
• Ice Climber
• Kid Icarus
• Kirby’s Adventure
• Mario Bros.
• Mega Man 2
• Metroid
• Ninja Gaiden
• Pac-Man
• Punch-Out!! Featuring Mr. Dream
• StarTropics
• Super C
• Super Mario Bros.
• Super Mario Bros. 2
• Super Mario Bros. 3
• Tecmo Bowl
• The Legend of Zelda
• Zelda II: The Adventure of Link

You know what’s awesome? You can relive these classic video games at the cost of $59.99! Like how even. Everyone should just be grateful that Nintendo didn’t jack up the cost of the system to match the original price of the Wii U.

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Really?

Where were these people when the title character of Nickelodeon’s Spongebob Squarepants, Family Guy’s Quagmire, and American Dad’s Roger the Alien called females CUNTs?

Let me back track a bit to put things in perspective since the whole world has gone mixed nuts in a whirlpool crazy.

Cartoons throughout the years have been criticized for their artwork, content, and story lines. Some have been harshly judged and even politically targeted. In the 1980s, cartoons were being pushed by special interest groups to be more educational after decades of being entertaining. Several fan favorite cartoons were pushed aside or totally discarded for the new cartoons that adhered to the new policy of being more “educational” (“brainwashed” and “dumbed down” are the more appropriate terms according to hardcore fans).  Classic cartoons like the beloved Popeye and Warner Brothers animated shorts from the 1930s, 1940s, and the 1950s were being attacked by critics in the 1980s as being vulgar, racist, violent, and sexist. Even the revolutionary cartoonist Ralph Bakshi  found his absolutely hysterical 80s version of Mighty Mouse being attacked by The American Family Association, a group from the religious right that had disdain for Mr. Bakshi  ever since he created an x-rated adult cartoon film called Fritz the Cat a decade before Mighty Mouse. In an episode of the popular revised version of the super rodent, Mighty Mouse sniffs the remains of  a flower that somehow got severely misconstrued by some viewers as Mighty Mouse snorting cocaine. Mr. Bakshi has gone on record denouncing drugs but instead of fighting this ridiculous claim about this episode, Mr. Bakshi allowed the scene to be cut even though CBS had approved of the scene. The episode, entitled “The Littlest Tramp” was not aired in reruns. Mr. Bakshi’s  attempt to appease the group made himself look guilty, and soon it was the end of the uproariously funny cartoon series which not only aired on Saturdays but occasionally on prime-time TV as well. It was THAT good.

If this simple act of Mighty Mouse sniffing a flower is so shocking, where are  the calls of protest and cancellation  from the Liberal Left , the Righteous Right, and from feminists and women’s organizations like NOW against American Dad, Family Guy, and SpongeBob Squarepants? American Dad and Spongebob Squarepants in particular had a male character utter a seemingly simple statement to a female character that was actually a veiled sentence for a most vulgar word. A nasty word so derogatory towards women that you’d be hard pressed to find a male equivalent for that word. The Liberal Left would foam at the mouth to crucify anyone on the right who would have said it. Yet because the these shows  are liberal favorites and are produced by liberal people, they got a pass. Had a right leaning show or cartoon used the statement,  the terms “sexist”, “misogynistic”, and of course “a war on women” would have been thrown haphazardly at the program and the network showing it by those on the left.

The euphemisms used by American Dad and  Spongebob Squarepants are “Catch You Next Tuesday” and “See You Next Tuesday”.  The sounds of the first letter of each word in these sentences  spell out the harsh, unpleasant word “C*NT” (replace the asterisk with the letter “U“) and little children have been exposed to it thanks to Spongebob Squarepants.

It’s clearly heard in this episode of SpongeBob Squarepants which airs  on Nickelodeon. A children’s channel that obviously is not paying attention to its own programming because what knucklehead of an executive would have allowed such an inappropriate crass statement be said on a kids’ network? Obviously one who likes to circumvent the FCC guidelines. Here is the link to that particular segment of  the episode:  https://youtu.be/3Sm2XjESino

To add injury to insult, his female teacher gets “accidentally” hit on the head with what appears to be a part of the boat that the lead title character seems to have crashed as seen here: https://youtu.be/NPapXq_zZl4

American Dad is a cartoon created by Liberals Seth MacFarlane, Mike Barker, and Matt Weitzman to satirize conservatism. Like Family Guy, it’s an adult themed cartoon that children do watch given that it’s on television multiple times a day and like Family Guy, they use American Dad to label and demonize the right which they  often paint as close minded and evil. The right has a war on women? I have yet to come across a right leaning cartoon that has called a female character a c*nt on television programs like Spongebob SquarePants, American Dad, and Family Guy have done. It can’t even be condoned on the MacFarlane shows, but to say it in a children’s cartoon, on Nickelodeon no less? Bugs Bunny was put through hell for dropping anvils on some cartoon character’s head and this is okay with people?

In Episode 2 of Season 1 of American Dad (2005), lead character Stan Smith’s wife, Francine,  gets a real estate job where she excels and makes more money than her husband. He gets jealous because evidently, all Christian men on the right are too macho to deal with a woman making more than her husband  according to the writers of this show; and yet at one point, Roger the illegal alien (from outer space, not from another nation on Earth) says to an acquaintance of his over the phone that  he has to hang up the telephone because Francine, ” the boss is being a real “Catch you Next Tuesday.”

It’s not the first time a MacFarlane produced cartoon referenced the “C” word. In an episode of Family Guy, Brian the dog, Stewie Griffin, and the oversexed and often perverted neighbor Quagmire go on a cross-country trip in Quagmire’s recreational vehicle. Brian points out to Quagmire that his RV has the word “cross-country” misspelled on it. The letter “u” is missing in it, thereby spelling out “cuntry”. Quagmire assures Brian that it is spelled the way he wants it to be spelled.

Mighty Mouse sniffing flowers was unacceptable and yet the euphemism for the “C” Word uttered on nationwide television, including a children’s network is accepted?  It’s probably best that people put Decaf in that UNT mug and get their priorities in order.

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